Thursday, July 12, 2007

Things I Don't Get #297

People who do not observe the social norm also known as "the buffer zone."

Example #1: If there are three stalls in, say, your workplace restroom and you take the first one because, hello, everyone knows that it's the least germy, should someone enter after you, they should always take the stall on the end, thus allowing the middle stall to serve as the buffer zone. This allows for what little semblance of privacy remains when sitting in a room with another human while your pants and undies are around your ankles.

Example #2: Should a movie theater be nearly empty and you happen to be sitting in the back row near the middle, the next patrons to enter should, under absolutely no circumstances, sit directly next to or in front of you. Furthermore, as the theater fills up, there should be at least one seat between you and and a patron with whom you have no relationship whatsoever.

Hello, social norms. Observe them.

6 comments:

Aaron said...

Talking on the phone in the bathroom should somehow be incorporated into rule number 1.

It happens all the time at my office.

Heidi said...

Amen Sista! Number 2 drives me nuts. I have been known to fake saving a seat so that "buffer zone" is established. Duh!

Laura said...

And, why do some coworkers think it's okay to keep talking to you after you go in the stall? I can only do one thing at a time, people. Let me pee in peace.

emawkc said...

What I don't get is people who just walk out of the bathroom when they're done WITHOUT washing their hands.

I mean, at a minimum you should at least FAKE wash your hands, like I do.

Andy said...

lmao@ buffer zone. great way of putting it.
For the gentlemen, its the one guy who pees in the stall right next to you and proceeds to strike up a conversation. For me, it's generally at work, and a student will ask me a question and I'll be thinking..."For Christs sake, I'll be back in my office in 48 seconds..can this wait???"

ryguy said...

Germs don't stick to porcelain. That's why they make toilets out of it. There are no more or less germs per stall. It's all in your head. But boy do I have some gross Johnny on the Job stories for you!